decision making

We are a group of 14 people in one team. We all come from different places. Our histories are different, and our futures will be diverse. We are all different. We think different, act different, and feel different.
Still we choose to be together for three years and walk the same path, sail the same boat. It wasn’t clear what the path would look like, or what the destination would be, only that all of us together would decide upon that.

It’s Tuesday afternoon and we have a team discussion. There are 14 Chairs in a circle, someone writes on the whiteboard, someone writes an sms out of sight. A group of people talks about pending issues, others are quiet, listening. Then there is a voice: - “Sorry but what are we talking about? I thought this was to be quick decision making, I’m not up for this and would rather go and do my own things.”

The group sets a timeframe for the topic and continues tackling the issues. Again there is a voice: - “I’m not sure about you guys, but I feel disconnected to this topic, and I miss passion. It feels lame the way we sit here, can we take a break or do an energizer maybe?”

After a ten minutes smoking break the group picks up on the subject again. Someone throws in a ‘practicality’, someone goes outside to make a phone call and a new facilitator stands up. Then one of the quiet people speaks: - “We agreed to find a solution for the problem. The only thing we have done so far is complaining about it. Could we possibly start to look at solutions?”

The energy in the room changes and becomes more energetic. More people talk now, not quite orderly. Someone says: - “I have a proposition. Why don’t we make a list and take a vote?” Five other people comment on this: - “No, that wouldn’t work; we tried that before remember last time? I don’t think you can vote on a sensitive topic like this; let’s make it free for everyone to do what he likes; can’t we use the dialogue?” People exchange looks of despair, oh no, not him again with his silly propositions. How can he be so insensitive to the temperature in the room? Without much more consideration a dialogue is started. Again someone speaks: - “ We spent an hour on this now, and I thought we would touch upon other subjects too. Can we just send an email around with the things we discussed and ask everyone who isn’t here for their opinion?”

There is some murmur about us never finishing anything properly. Others look relieved, or even indifferent. The group splits up in little groups chatting about the talk. Outside, one of the smokers confides in another: - “I was so annoyed with the facilitator. The way he really didn’t listen to anything that was said. I had a solution all along, but sharing it? Someone else will probably propose it after the break. I’m going home, sick and tired of this, see you tomorrow.”

Back inside there are only four people left. All other went to mind very urgent businesses that they had. A solution is found in 3 minutes, but no one thinks it is carried in the team. Another email is sent out. Please do reply today.